Monday, November 3, 2008

"No, I mentioned the bisque"

Uh, when a guy claims to be "the last of a dying breed," don't believe it. In his profile he preached on and on about how he knows how to treat a woman, his high morals and how he was raised right with old school values etc, etc.

First of all he was late. I sat outside of a cute little Italian restaurant in the North End for 20 min. When he finally did arrive the waiter took us to our table, looked at him and said "she waited a long time." I loved it!

He seemed a little nervous and right away ordered a bottle of wine. This of course was just fine with me, as I'm an avid drinker myself. However, I've never seen someone drink a glass of wine like a shot of tequila on cinco de mayo. Before our food even hit the table we were on bottle number 2. Maybe he figured that I now knew he was not the 5'11" he claimed to be, more like 5'8". Or maybe he wanted to loosen up before telling me that he lives with his parents. Either way I couldn't figure out why he kept speaking in such a hushed tone. Did he think we were in a scene from the Godfather? Were the heads of the 5 families behind us?

At one point we were discussing live music. He mentioned a great place we could go to after. I did't want to commit to anything so I just kind of said "um, maybe." His reply, "well I'm going anyway, you can come if you want." A true gentleman.

The restaurant was really good though. We had calamari with roasted peppers. My dish was this fabulous chicken with artichokes and mushrooms in a white wine sauce. I don't really care what he ate.

When we were through the waiter brought us a couple complementary shots of Sambuca. His went down like a $5 hooker. I couldn't finish mine. Don't think it went to waste though, he polished it off within seconds. That must have been him showing me his softer side.

He did hand his credit card over immediately once the check arrived, not that I had any intention of reaching for my wallet.

I was liquored up enough by the time we left to walk over to this live music spot he mentioned. After a couple drinks I was over it and loaded enough to tell him so. He acted shocked and wanted to know when I realized we weren't a fit. "Right away." I got in a cab and took myself home.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

On Line Dating

What's with all the scenic pictures people? Apparently everyone on these sites has been to London or Egypt. We get it, you're well traveled. Great. Now show me some close up pictures so I know what you look like. Not these shots where its you and a bunch of friends at some type of sporting event and I can't even tell which one is you. And please stop putting up photos of your pets. If I wanted to rescue an animal I'd head to the pound. If you think you're winning me over with your cute little dog you're wrong. I'm still picking hairs out of my coat from a date I went on over a year ago.

While we're at it why not be honest about everything. Do you really spend your weekends at a Museum? Really? Because in one of your pictures it looks like you're doing a keg stand. That is you, right, upside down with your mouth around the nozzle. Yeah, I thought so. Way to show off your fun side. Just what I'm looking for, some overgrown frat boy who ponders modern art on the weekends.

Now for all you sensitive types. Yes a girl wants a nice guy, someone she can count on, yada yada yada. But please, save something for later. You're practically proposing on the site. To be honest I think you might become quite a stalker if things didn't work out. More than that, you sound like a pussy. Get a back bone. Have a little confidence. No girl wants some sappy guy that apparently want to be "my prince."

That said, I'm back on the sites anyway. I'll keep you posted on the outcomes of the dates.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008


A random Tuesday night, with nothing to do, led me over to a place in Cambridge I'd been meaning to check out. A little place called Toad. The space itself might be small but the music permeating the intimate setting was far from.

The headline act was a tremendous band of talent called Qwill. The sheer jubilation this band transcended into the crowd forced you to rock your head, clap your hands and stomp your feet to every heavenly beat and strum.

As soon as, Jesse Ciarmataro, the lead singer/ songwriter/ guitarist/ keyboardist, began to play you could just see the music awaken through him in his every move. Before a single vocal escaped him, you knew this guy was the real deal. Once those vocals did pour out of him, you were literally astonished by his abilities. He rocked a crowded room with the help of his amazingly eclectic band. On back up vocals he had Sarah Semenski, with her bluesy soulful notes. The percussions were methodically beaten out by Wacki, who used every unorthodoxed instrument you could think of, even tapping upon half full pint glasses at one point and presenting tap like movements to amplify the beads wrapped between his Adidas's and Dickies at another. A guest trumpet player and a couple of guest bassists rounded out this awe-inspiring experience.

Even the opening band of the night, Lake Street Dive, proved to be an enormous talent with Rachel's vocals lending a jazz feel to the room.

Toad is open 7 nights a week, offering incredible music and never charging a cover. Many of the bands hold residency for the month, giving you the option to see your favorites again.